Line Graph Model Essay
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The line graph shows thefts per thousand vehicles in four countries between 1990 and 1999. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
The line graph presents the rate of car thefts per thousand vehicles in Great Britain, Sweden, France, and Canada over a decade, from 1990 to 1999.
Overall, it is evident that Great Britain faced a notably higher incidence of car theft compared to the other three nations, with a relatively stable rate across the decade. Meanwhile, Canada showed a promising decrease, and France and Sweden fluctuated but ended the decade with rates similar to their starting points.
Great Britain had the highest rate of car theft throughout the period, starting at around 20 thefts per thousand vehicles. Although there was a slight decline towards the mid-90s, the rate climbed back up to its initial level by the end of the decade. In contrast, Canada exhibited the lowest rate, beginning just below 10 thefts per thousand vehicles, with a consistent downward trend to well under 10 by 1999.
France and Sweden displayed similar patterns, with both starting around 10 thefts per thousand vehicles in 1990. Over the next nine years, France experienced a gradual but steady increase in car thefts, reaching a peak of just over 10 in 1993 before stabilizing at slightly fewer than that by 1999. Conversely, Sweden’s car theft rate initially decreased, hitting the lowest point at about 7 in 1996, after which it climbed to finish the period at just under 10 thefts per thousand vehicles.
200 words
➡️ Why this essay qualifies for a Band 7,5 score:
Overall, it is evident that Great Britain faced a notably higher incidence of car theft compared to the other three nations, with a relatively stable rate across the decade. Meanwhile, Canada showed a promising decrease, and France and Sweden fluctuated but ended the decade with rates similar to their starting points.
Great Britain had the highest rate of car theft throughout the period, starting at around 20 thefts per thousand vehicles. Although there was a slight decline towards the mid-90s, the rate climbed back up to its initial level by the end of the decade. In contrast, Canada exhibited the lowest rate, beginning just below 10 thefts per thousand vehicles, with a consistent downward trend to well under 10 by 1999.
France and Sweden displayed similar patterns, with both starting around 10 thefts per thousand vehicles in 1990. Over the next nine years, France experienced a gradual but steady increase in car thefts, reaching a peak of just over 10 in 1993 before stabilizing at slightly fewer than that by 1999. Conversely, Sweden’s car theft rate initially decreased, hitting the lowest point at about 7 in 1996, after which it climbed to finish the period at just under 10 thefts per thousand vehicles.
200 words
➡️ Why this essay qualifies for a Band 7,5 score:
- Task Achievement: The summary covers the main features of the graph, providing an overview of trends and making some comparisons between the countries. However, for a higher band, it might need to include specific data points for all key features and a more thorough comparison.
- Coherence and Cohesion: The information is well-organized, and there is a clear overall progression in the response. Nevertheless, for a Band 8 or 9, the essay might benefit from more sophisticated cohesive devices and paragraphing that emphasizes key comparisons and trends more effectively.
- Lexical Resource: The summary uses a range of vocabulary to describe trends and changes. However, for a Band 8 or 9, it may need to demonstrate a greater range of vocabulary and less common lexical items with precision.
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy: The text displays a variety of sentence structures and appropriate use of grammar. However, there could be some minor errors, or lack of complex structures that would be required for a higher band score.
- Specificity in Data Points: A higher band score would often include specific figures to illustrate trends, rather than only qualitative descriptions. For example, mentioning the exact rate of thefts at key points in the timeline for each country could make the summary more informative.
- Comparative Language: While the summary makes comparisons, a higher band could make use of a wider range of comparative structures and vocabulary to clearly contrast the trends between countries.
- Variety in Sentence Structures: Using a wider variety of complex sentence structures can demonstrate a higher level of English proficiency. This might include more subordinate clauses, conditionals, and varied conjunctions.
- In terms of grammatical accuracy and vocabulary, the summary does not display glaring errors, which is a positive aspect. To further improve, it would be about enhancing the use of language and the precision of the information provided. If there's anything specific you would like to focus on, let me know, and I can provide more detailed advice or rework the summary accordingly.
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The graph below shows the consumption of 3 spreads from 1981 to 2007
The line graph illustrates the amount of three kinds of spreads (margarine, low fat and reduced spreads and butter) which were consumed over 26 years from 1981 to 2007. Units are measured in grams.
Overall, the consumption of margarine and butter decreased over the period given, while for low fat and reduced spreads, it rose. At the start of the period, butter was the most popular spread, which was replaced by margarine from 1991 to 2001, and following that low fat and reduced spreads became the most widely used spread in the final years.
With regards to the amount of butter used, it began at around 140 grams and then peaked at 160 grams in 1986 before falling dramatically to about 50 grams in the last year. Likewise, approximately 90 grams of margarine was eaten in the first year after which the figure fluctuated slightly and dropped to a low of 40 grams in 2007.
On the other hand, the consumption of low fats and reduced spreads only started in 1996 at about 10 grams. This figure, which reached a high of just over 80 grams 5 years later, fell slightly in the final years to approximately 70 grams in 2007.
179 words
This essay qualifies for a Band 9 score
Overall, the consumption of margarine and butter decreased over the period given, while for low fat and reduced spreads, it rose. At the start of the period, butter was the most popular spread, which was replaced by margarine from 1991 to 2001, and following that low fat and reduced spreads became the most widely used spread in the final years.
With regards to the amount of butter used, it began at around 140 grams and then peaked at 160 grams in 1986 before falling dramatically to about 50 grams in the last year. Likewise, approximately 90 grams of margarine was eaten in the first year after which the figure fluctuated slightly and dropped to a low of 40 grams in 2007.
On the other hand, the consumption of low fats and reduced spreads only started in 1996 at about 10 grams. This figure, which reached a high of just over 80 grams 5 years later, fell slightly in the final years to approximately 70 grams in 2007.
179 words
This essay qualifies for a Band 9 score